Bumps, twists and turns on the way to menopause ‘thriving’.

The pressure was off and I was out to enjoy myself with my friends. A girls’ weekend away with sightseeing, pizza, a few glasses of red wine and beer and some laughs. The Verona marathon event had been my main aim of the year. The day I was going to break the 4 hour marathon barrier. But having already ticked that box in the summer, the pressure was off.

It’s a good job, because there was a big block of red (ie incomplete training sessions) on my training plan. A close friend had died in the autumn, and a lot of time, energy and emotion had been rightly spent there.

Verona Marathon

The first half of the Verona marathon was fabulous; running along the river and through the beautiful city. Then there was the hard slog out towards the countryside and some evil miles on weird hard concrete. I was lifted again by an army barracks with soldiers standing to attention. That was unexpected.

I finally dragged myself back into the city centre to finish pretty strong and with a smile.

In 3.47.08
July 2023 time: 3 48.33
All time PB, Florence 2013: 3.43.33.

Amazing. I was so pleased. A ‘good for age’ entry in London 2025 awaits.

So that was it. My recovery year, getting on track with HRT was complete. I was riding the menopause wave with renewed vigour, and it was time to enjoy my 50^th birthday celebrations, a rest and an end of year break.

My colleague Nick was moving home to Belfast and on my birthday night out, we’d both egged each other on to sign up for the Belfast Marathon in May. A good friend Stuart, helped by giving me the gift of an event entry for my birthday present (nudge).

New Year, New Goals

January saw an enthusiastic New Year mapping out of a training plan that would take me to a faster marathon, and hopefully another step closer to my PB.

Off I went.

Training went well in the first couple of weeks in January, despite some personal life challenges and two periods in one month. Weird, I thought….

My husband had bought me a fancy watch for my 50th. It would help me to find my way in the mountains. But the data was telling me I wasn’t at my best. Not sleeping. Struggling to get more than 5/6 hours sleep a night. Sometimes less. Heart rate variability showed I was fatigued.

I couldn’t work out if it was life stress induced, or hormone driven. What I did know is that I felt like shit.

I was having periods every two weeks, and it became concerning. A call to the GP at the end of February set me on course for a scan and some blood tests. All a formality, I presumed.

Then I got an urgent same-day referral to the gynaecologist. Cue a worrying couple of weeks, with a potential cancer diagnosis on the horizon. It sent me and my husband into a spin, and I was grateful to close friends and colleagues for the safe space to be honest about what was going on in the midst of Board meetings and some important family events.

In the end all was well and I am grateful I didn’t have long to wait to find out. A six month check up on the horizon but I’m 100% confident there’s nothing to worry about.

I am blessed that I have never been down the mental path of a cancer scare before. It gave me a teeny, tiny, minuscule insight into the fear and trepidation that comes with any health scare and a dose of perspective and gratitude for my usual good health.

An ‘all clear’ didn’t change the fact that I was still experiencing heavy periods every two weeks, feeling drained, and struggling to train. Work was busy and life was stressful. I was struggling.

A few weeks earlier, flopped on the sofa on a Saturday morning with exhaustion, struggling to summon up the energy for my long run, I had messaged a friend to say I was postponing the marathon until next year. Thankfully the Belfast Marathon system doesn’t allow you to do that without a GP note. So I decided to wait until I’d seen the GP.

Interestingly, once I got the urgent referral and was on that treadmill, my mindset shifted from postpone to re-commit. I decided that a focus on training for the marathon was the best thing I could do, mentally and physically. Running is my stress relief.

So if there was going to be a cancer diagnosis, I needed to be running. And I would want to be as fit and strong as I could be. So I decided to stick to the plan, kept my marathon entry but dialled up the self-compassion. If I was feeling drained with the fortnightly bleeding, I promised I would listen to my body, be kind to myself and do what felt good and restorative.

Renewed energy

Fast forward to the end of April, and I’m feeling good. I’m three weeks into a new HRT combination, and it has been three weeks since I had my last period. So hopefully, something is working. That’s the biggest break from bleeding, I’ve had since January. My energy is returning and I’m feeling mentally better after a period of sleep struggles, anxiety and brain fog that comes with menopause.

Belfast is now on the near horizon. As I’m writing this on the train, Nick has just messaged me with the beginnings of the pre-event plans. Where shall we meet? When shall we pick up our number? What are we doing?? I love observing this pre event process. There are so many patterns in it and I will try to hold onto all that I’ve learnt over the years.

Hold it lightly. Have fun. Possibly- Smash it!

And whatever happens, be grateful that I’m here and not somewhere more scary. Life is good.

A friend said to me when I got the all clear from my tests. “Live Big”. A colleague just messaged me with a question to ponder in my coaching session today: “Are you thriving?” And the cleaner on the way in to work just now said “We’re alright. That’s the main thing isn’t it?“.

Life lessons in every conversation. If we’re open, and listening.

One final thought. I bloody love our NHS. It needs protecting and nurturing. The fact that I went from urgent referral fear to reassurance and clarity in two weeks is phenomenal.

Race day update from the shuttle bus

A few more bumps. Plane cancelled, and am now on day 6 of a period. The doctor did say it’d take a few months to settle back down and then I shouldn’t have periods any more. Bring on that day after 33 years! In the meantime I had a couple of pints of Guinness to top up the iron.

Great to meet Nick yesterday. Andy and I have had a brilliant time in Belfast already. What a city! Back to sightseeing this afternoon after a little murals and marathon tour.

Post event update

That was a week ago now. The marathon was amazing. But hard! I was on pace and on track for a PB for the first half. Then came the hills and the fatigue. I was still bleeding heavily and had to stop to use the toilet a couple of times. Annoying to lose time standing in a queue when every second saved was so hard earnt.

I struggled through the last 8km, finishing on my knees in 3.52.55.

More learnings and more things to learn.

1. Look at the elevation profile of the event months before, not the day before. Then train for the hills!

2. Be proud of 3.52. That’s the third sub four hour marathon within a year. Something that seemed unattainable in Jan ‘23.

3. Look back over this journey and remember that in February you were about to postpone to next year.

Be kind to yourself.

There’s another chapter to start writing. The training plan is written and the legs are recovering. Time to enjoy a weekend in the sun.